{"id":64759,"date":"2020-04-27T08:26:39","date_gmt":"2020-04-27T07:26:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/?p=64759"},"modified":"2020-04-27T14:44:49","modified_gmt":"2020-04-27T13:44:49","slug":"quarantine-porn-10-tips-to-not-fall-into-the-trap","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/quarantine-porn-10-tips-to-not-fall-into-the-trap\/","title":{"rendered":"Quarantine and porn: 10 tips to not fall into the trap"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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Quarantine and porn:
10 tips to not fall into the trap<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
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However small or big, addictions concerns us all. Take a closer look, aren`t we all hooked (at least a bit\u2026) to something? Work, screens, food, sport, smoking, videogames, shopping, etc.: whether it be a substance or a habit, each one of us have a weak spot! <\/strong><\/h2>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
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During this time of quarantine, let\u2019s be cautious: our uncontrolled and invasive habits are likely to get worse. Subsequently, new compulsive behaviours may appear \u2013 especially if we are vulnerable. As a matter of fact, for addictions, quarantine is a period of abundance unhoped for. Every passing day, gives a silver platter of unpleasant experiences: discontent, unpleasant emotions, upheaval of our routines, arguments, privations\u2026<\/p>

In this agonising context, a guilty pleasure can take be dangerous for oneself: pornography. Careful! This guilty pleasure is in reality a trap: the snare being\u2026. Porn. And its deception, is to make us believe that it\u2019s for our own good. Here are 10 tips to not fall\u2026 with our eyes wide open into this trap.<\/p>

NB: This article speaks about pornography but the tips proposed are valuable whatever your weakness may be. To consume without any moderation!<\/em><\/p>

#1 \u2013 In response to the pandemic\u2026 You are not in war!<\/strong><\/h3>

In general, addiction is an unconscious strategy to escape unpleasant experiences: thoughts, emotions, etc. Sadly, this struggle is always inefficient and creates more pain than relief. Moreover, these thoughts and emotions are not the enemies! So, like one says in judo: mate! Stop\u2026! The struggle is over.<\/p>

#2 \u2013 Move away\u2026 from the exhaust hood<\/strong><\/h3>

During the quarantine, we spend a lot of time in the kitchen. The sales of flour has exploded. It\u2019s good\u2026. But pay attention to bad grub, to stodgy food and especially the exhaust hood. Porn is a false addictive promise, a bad publicity that seduces each one\u2019s weaknesses. Just like in a lottery, 100% of porn addicts\u2026 have tried their luck. It\u2019s better to pass your turn!<\/p>

#3 \u2013 Vaccinate yourself from the #pornovirus\u2026 by exposing yourself to your emotions<\/strong><\/h3>

However unpleasant, emotions do not kill. They inform us about our needs and helps us to adapt ourselves. For example, fear calls us to be vigilant. Hence, emotions means life! Do not seek to anesthetize them! For you to expose your emotions, here is a very concrete step: in the heat of the moment, during an emotional turmoil, stay alert to your physical sensation. There is just one question to ask yourself: \u201cWhat do my emotions do to my body here and now, and in which place?\u201d<\/p>

#4 \u2013 Apply social distancing i.e.\u2026 your mental barriers<\/strong><\/h3>

Good news: porn addiction is essentially psychologic.<\/p>

Concretely, the dependence takes root in the brain. The main obstacle to overcome, is your mental barrier. So block all thoughts that imprison you. Your thoughts are not orders! When that \u201clittle voice\u201d whispers \u201cI\u2019m in need\u201d, you reply \u201cAre you sure\u201d! Make a list of your embarrassing thoughts, not your desires. This selective sorting requires practice but it\u2019s not complicated. It\u2019s good for the planet (less time spent on the internet\u2026) and most importantly, good for you.<\/p>

#5 \u2013 Stay connected to the basics and take action step by step<\/strong><\/h3>

In the face of addiction, people mistakenly believe that they lack willpower. To get out of this mentality, one needs motivation. And do you know what the foremost propellant for this? Values! In this word, there is no religious, philosophical or moral connotation. Values are everything that is important in our eyes, which are important in our life. We often forget, a rolling stone gathers no moss. The time has come to get a grip of things. Then, to take concrete actions step by step, even modest and simple ones. By which, pointing in the right direction, gives more meaning and focus to everyday life and makes it possible to raise one`s head.<\/p>

#6 \u2013 Be a lab-rat \u2026 and smile<\/strong><\/h3>

\u00ab\u00a0Do you know yourself?\u00a0\u00bb, says the saying. Are you conscious in the manner you function? Have you noticed that sometimes you are on auto-pilot and you lose control of things? Use this time in containment to discover and examine further the reasons and mysteries of your behaviour: Which are the trigger situations? Which thoughts are automatic and which emotions arise and interact? Which impulse pushes me? Which actions are voluntary or involuntary? By dissecting such your actions, you will realise that the behaviour is not just a single block, but more like a jack-in-the-box. The only pilot in the plane, is you. You can keep control.<\/p>

#7 \u2013 Facing the uncertainty of the after-coronavirus, live the certainty\u2026 of the present moment<\/strong><\/h3>

To be rooted in one`s present moment is an extremely efficient method to not fall into the trap of compulsive behaviour patterns. Being anchored in the present moment prevents one`s thoughts and emotions to run wild\u2026.and avoids the need to hide from them. This attitude of being present to oneself requires training, but it\u2019s available to each one. A regular practice routine results in quick and good habits. The key point is being mindful of the 5 senses and being aware of physical sensations. In spirit, it means to connect with oneself, to finally live the de-containment\u2026 but towards the interior.<\/p>

#8 \u2013 Catch yourself in infraction without an attestation<\/strong><\/h3>

When it comes to observing other people`s shortcomings, we are all big brothers. Less often do we have the habit to catch our own infraction of sleepwalking \u201cin a delusional infraction\u201d says Raymond Devos. In fact, self-disclosure could have some good\u2026 Find a stable position from which you can \u201cauto-observe\u201d and detect your triggers of auto-pilot. The advantage of this \u201cpoint of view\u201d, is that it can also constitute a safe-haven to isolate when there is an interior crisis.<\/p>

#9 \u2013 Prepare an exit plan from addiction<\/strong><\/h3>

I will mention just four measures. Find \u201cyour\u201d high-risk situations: circumstances, places, contexts, etc. What high-risk situations can I suppress or eliminate? How to cope with others? The first high-risk situations, is like a problem on a navigational device\u2026 Elaborate a protocol \u201cpost-accident\u201d. List the reactions to have that will help me bounce back after an uncontrolled escalation: to de-brief, to de-dramatize, to find an activity that (really) cheers me up and makes me feel good, etc. Elaborate a protocol \u201cto manage desires\u201d: identify trap thoughts, welcome unpleasant emotions, being aware of physical sensations, etc. Scan your lifestyle; cleanse your sleeping habits, body hygiene, diet, relaxation, physical activities, etc.<\/p>

#10 \u2013 Take example\u2026 on the penguin<\/strong><\/h3>

Don\u2019t get mistaken: I\u2019m not asking you to cut your arms! The penguin is not only anthropomorphic in its walk, we are to learn a lot from its behaviour as well. The life of penguins is fascinating (my daughters are going to make fun of me\u2026) For example, do you know that their two main predators (of the penguins, not my daughters) are the seal\u2026 leopard and the killer whale\u2026 interesting? You can\u2019t make this up! On the sea ice, the penguins are clumsy. They often slide out of control. But at the end of the winter, when it leaves the confinement zone to join the coast, he gets up after every drift and continues his way no matter what\u2026 Yourself, sometimes, you may feel a little out of balance. Like the penguin, you are first and foremost someone who is lovable, sympathetic, brave, courageous and clever. And on top of that, you are a human being, not an animal\u2026 So get going, safe travels! The winter is over.<\/p>

#11 \u2013 Bonus: and Jesus in all this?<\/strong><\/h3>

In your initiative towards change and liberation, your faith constitutes both a value and a resource.<\/p>

A value: it reinforces your motivation.<\/p>

A resource: it is an additional means of support. You can rely on the sacraments, on the support of your brothers and sisters in Christ, on prayer. The Word of God, can particularly reach you: it gives you advice of prudence and encouragements.<\/p>

Help yourself\u2026 Heaven will help you (this is not taken from the Bible\u2026 but a fable by LaFontaine. It does not take anything from relevance.)<\/p>

Tanguy Lafforgue<\/strong>,
coach and therapist.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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You suffer from addiction to pornography and\/or masturbation. Due to the coronavirus crisis, you are confined to your home, maybe confined with others. It\u2019s a mess\u2026 this uncomfortable situation could make you all the more fragile. But quarantine can also be an opportunity to do some beneficial work on yourself. <\/strong><\/em><\/p>

Get help! <\/strong><\/em><\/p>

\u00a0<\/p>

LE PARCOURS \u201cLIBRE POUR AIMER\u201d (in French)<\/strong><\/p>

This course in French, available by book or by email is designed to be followed for 40 days. It accompanies people taken into pornography towards a path of freedom.<\/p>

Learn more on <\/u><\/strong>Libre pour aimer<\/em><\/strong><\/a><\/p>

Register by <\/u><\/strong>email<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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Quarantine and porn: 10 tips to not fall into the trap However small or big, addictions concerns us all. Take a closer look, aren`t we all hooked (at least a bit\u2026) to something? Work, screens, food, sport, smoking, videogames, shopping, etc.: whether it be a substance or a habit, each one of us have a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":64760,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":"","_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"categories":[4,5,6],"tags":[591,592,590],"class_list":["post-64759","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-highlights","category-must-read","category-news","tag-addiction","tag-lockdown","tag-porn"],"acf":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/2\/2020\/04\/andras-vas-Bd7gNnWJBkU-unsplash-scaled.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64759","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/8"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=64759"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64759\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/64760"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=64759"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=64759"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emmanuel.info\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=64759"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}